Israel regards hacking as terrorism

Israel has said that it will respond with military force if any of its companies are hacked.

The nation has said that it will respond to cyber-attacks in the same way it responds to violent “terrorist” acts.

This will mean that if Anonymous hits an Israeli company it can expect Israeli commandos to parachute into the area they live and hit the local school with white phosphorous grenades before buggering off. Otherwise, they could wake up in the morning with their house surrounded by a large wall, with cops at the gate who will not let them go to work in the morning.

It is all because a hacker named OxOmar, claiming to be Saudi, said last week he had leaked the private information on 6,000 Israeli credit cards.

While that should mean that the Israelis should be training to parachute into Saudi as we speak, it appears that OxOmar might be a 19-year-old living in Mexico.

Deputy Foreign Minister Danny Ayalon told the Beeb that he knew OxOmar is living in Mexico but had not approached Mexican coppers to ask for help. They might have their hands full with drugs barons who cut people’s heads off to be too worried about Israeli credit cards.

However, Ayalon said that cyber-attacks are a breach of sovereignty comparable to a terrorist operation, and must be treated as such.

“Israel has active capabilities for striking at those who are trying to harm it, and no agency or hacker will be immune from retaliatory action,” he added, without giving further details.

OxOmar might want to avoid any blind dates with stunning Israeli women in the next year or so. If Mossad follows its usual plan he could end up drugged and on a plane to Jerusalem. Flying to Uganda might not be such a good idea either, as Israeli commandos already know the way there.