Apple will release Iphone 5se

lemon batteryThe foremost fruity cargo cult known as Apple has confirmed that it is about to make an idiot of itself releasing a smaller “cheaper” iPhone 5, in March.

While everyone else has moved away from smaller forms, Apple has decided that there is much money to be made creating a 4-inch iPhone, dubbed the “iPhone 5se.”

The iPhone 5se is expected to be cheaper and smaller than the iPhone 5s but is expected to have many of the “features” that made the iPhone 5s a lemon when it came to the market.

Apple cancelled orders for the iPhone 5s after it found its warehouses were full of them. So Apple thought that the best way to improve iPhone sales was to release a phone which was based on a failure but was actually smaller and less useful – what could possibly go wrong?

The new 4-inch iPhone 5se is designed to spur iPhone hardware upgrades for customer seeking faster devices without upgrading to the far larger iPhone 6s and 6s Plus screen sizes.

At the moment this is all rumour and speculation, but in this case it has been printed in one of the more reliable sources for Apple rumours the Cult of Mac.