TechEye warns against online 'Meow Meow'

The families of two jaded tech hacks have spoken out about legal meme LOLcats to the Government, urging for it to be banned before more internet savvy hacks kill themselves.

John Hacke, father of tragic suicidal 32 year old Aaron Hacke, said it was shameful that ministers have not yet acted on the LOLcat meme. He told TechEye, “I’m convinced that because it’s legal, my son thought it was safe. However if the government had banned it maybe this death wouldn’t have happened.”

Publishing bosses are the latest to speak out against LOLcats, with Humbert Bumblebridge, head of Ragge Publishing, East Stevenage, voicing his concern. “Because LOLcats are legal, there is nothing we can do to stop the viewing of LOLcats at our publishing house. Sure, we can ban LOLcat websites from our in-house servers, but at the end of the day, our hacks can just go home and view LOLcats on their home computers.”

Home secretary Alan Johnson has come under heavy fire from the friends and families of the tragic LOLcat suicides as news came about that a government ban has been delayed by six months.

In another blow to the relatives, Lord “Tony Blairdelsome” admitted publicly that he had never even heard of LOLcats before.  He was made to say by TechEye although we have put some words into his gobby mouth: “I had no idea what a LOLcat was before today. However, now that it has been associated very tragically with the deaths of these two young hacks, we will look at it speedily and take any action needed.”

A top new media analyst said today that banning LOLcat memes would send “a clear message” to anyone considering pushing the retweet button.

A. Hacke and friend Aalfiyak Plaeyjurism both committed suicide shortly after having been exposed to the same LOLcat meme for the 6,000th time. Police are investigating. TechEye is urging readers to stay vigilant on behalf of loved ones and to steer clear of Facebook, Bebo, 4Chan, Something Awful, B3ta and Twitter in case of LOLcats.