Man writes autobiography in Tweets

If you’ve ever fancied penning your autobiography but just don’t have the time or money to get published, then help may be at hand.

An American film maker has reinvented the idea of the memoir by writing his life story in Tweets.

Matthew Carrozo managed to condense all the major parts of his life down to 248 Tweets, from the start – “1. September 7th 1984. I am born at St John’s Hospital in Queens, New York City to Matty & Michele Carrozo, the two best people on Earth”. To the finish: “245. Two weeks ago, I quit my job to be an artist myself. 246. Today is my last day. Let’s see if I can make it work. So that should bring you up to speed. 247. Oh. 248. I hear mom has started painting again.”

And, according to his website, he wrote the whole thing up in one night last week.

It’s a roller coaster ride of a story in 140 characters (or fewer) chunks, spread between New York, Portugal (his mum’s native country) and his “eye opening” days as a student in the UK (documented in the magic mushroom episodes in Tweet 209). 

There’s plenty of heartache, with bullying at school and the family’s move to Portugal after his dad’s accident left them dependent on food stamps. 

But there’s plenty of happy stuff too: the birth of his brother Nicholas in Tweet 12, discovering ET, learning to love Portugal and learning Portuguese, and finding love at first sight in London.

Amid the laughter and the tears are the other bits – “I lose my virginity in the school car park with a boy named Tiago” (Tweet 141), commuting 20 hours a week to his first “real” job in Deptford and being inspired by his mum Michele’s paintings.

Carrozo describes himself on LinkedIn as “New Yorker by nature, European by nurture,” adding “I was born Stateside, raised in Portugal and attended higher education in the UK. I often wake up in fear that I sound like Loyd Grossman”.

He currently lives in Muswell Hill in London. Oh, and he’s available for work – “I just quit my job to make films for a living,” his website declares. “You should hire me.”

According to his Twitter account this morning, Carrozo had 2,082 followers.

Amazing what one can achieve in a night’s work.

By comparison, a quick look at Tony Blair’s Twitter page this morning revealed 6,548 followers – only about 4,500 more than Carrozo.

Maybe the ex-PM should have opted for a more concise version of his recent memoir My Journey. Though we wonder how many followers he would have lost with the cringe-worthy accounts of his, er, more intimate moments with Cherie.