Ye Booke of In-Tel


And it came to pass that the Tablets of Smug were passed unto the Promised land by the Children of Jobs, after King Ballmer failed to flog them, even on eBay. But the Children of In-Tel were perplexed for they likethed not the Tablets, for they were neither PC or netbook and did not need the Chips of Chipzilla. “Tablets liketh not the Atom, nor the Sandybridge and run only on the ARM of Satan, thus we must kill them, even unto stone dead,” they muttered. And they looked about them for a weapon that they could use to smite the Tablet of Jobs and then did note that a tablet lacked a keyboard. What would happen if we created a Tablet but gave unto it a keyboard to make it more useful? They asked unto themselves and behold was the Ultrabook created. But when the designed of In-tel did take unto their designs to their allies in the manufacturing world, were not the OEMs unimpressed. Did they not say unto the designers of In-Tel that it would cost a lot to make? In-Tel was perplexed. How was it possible that Jobs could make an expensive tablet for $600 and yet nailing a Keyboard onto it costeth another $400. And the OEMs did spake and say unto them “We cannot get the wood these days and besides we wish to have unto ourselves the mark up of Steve Jobs.” However, In-Tel did reply unto them and point out that there was no way they were going to ever get the mark up of Steve Jobs, for only Apple Fanboys would pay those prices. But the OEMS hardened their hearts, for was it not written that Steve Jobs was a game changer and had lifted prices even unto the heavens itself. “If thou would have us drop our prices and reduce our mark-ups, thou would first hath to drop thine own mark-ups. Do thou not maketh more than 50 per cent mark up on thine own silicon?” And In-Tel did cough and did say that was different. For where would Chipzilla be without its stonking prophets? And doth not the double dip recesssion loometh where seven thin cows shall eateth of seven fat cows? And the OEMS did spake and argue that Intel then maketh one rule for others and another for itself. “We trust not in the low mark-up any longer, for it is only us that hath to conform unto it. Hath not even Ech-Peh hath left the land of low mark up and we shall have no more faith in it either.” And In-Tel had to admit that its Ultrabooks were stuffed, even unto the extra USB socket.