Wall Street writes off RIM

The cocaine nose jobs of Wall Street have emerged from their powder stained executive toilets to declare that mobile outfit RIM is totally buggered.

This ranking is below its earlier assesment of “being up S*ht Creek without a paddle” but still above the ranking “we are hanging out the chairman in the garden so that the tits can peck his body for much needed winter food.”

According to Reuters, more than ten brokerages cut their price targets on the stock, some by as much as half, a day after the company reported worse-than expected quarterly results.

They are now saying that RIM could run out of cash as early as next year and ultimately fail, even with the launch of its now-delayed BlackBerry 10 device.

RIM shares were down 16 percent in pre-market trading on the Nasdaq.

Nomura Equity Research told Reuters that if RIM continues to be run as it is the company will eventually fail.

It has not got a bat’s chance in hell of successfully drive a turnaround of its financials, even with the launch of BB10 next year.

He made a nice model which assumes that RIM disappears by 2020 in a gradual decline to show his clients.

The BlackBerry 10 was considered to be RIM’s make-or-break product but has been delayed more than the second coming of Jesus and will be nearly a year out of date when it hits the shops.

Barclays said in a note to clients that the BB10 can’t come soon enough.

Analysts at Citi Investment Research said things are getting works for RIM and it will run out of cash within two years.

Other analysts expected to see more write-offs. The new BB10 products are likely to be too little too late.

RIM is laying off 5,000 workers, about 30 percent of its workforce, as it tries to save cash.

Citi said the company is daft as it should be hiring instead of firing to get its products out on time.

TechEye’s financial expert said that while the news is bad for RIM, it should make the banks stand up and notice.  “After all it makes my credit card bill look bloody brilliant by comparison and means that I am finally a valued customer.”