HP rushes results to the printers

HP, the maker of printer ink which is more precious than liquid gold is dashing off to the printers to make sure the world+dog knows that all is well with the company.

The dark satanic rumour mill has manufactured a hellish yarn which has implied that things were not going well at HP. There were rumours of trouble ahead, and HP was keen to point out that while there was there’s music and moonlight and love and romance it could skip the rumours and dance.

According to Reuters, HP is going to issue its report a day ahead of schedule, to stave off problems caused after Bloomberg reported CEO Leo Apotheker warned his executives in an internal memo of “another tough quarter” and asked them to watch every penny and minimise hiring.

Shares fell four per cent when the memo saw the light of day and HP thinks that it might be damaged unless it releases its results earlier.

HP was expected to go into its announcements with lowered expectations because it trimmed sales forecasts in March, but the memo implied that HP was still having trouble from competition from Cisco and Oracle, lower consumer spending on PCs, and because it is spending lots to get into cloud computing.

The cocaine noses of Wall Street already worked out that things were not going swimmingly for HP but had factored everything they thought HP was worth. No one was expecting surprise growth.

One wonders what Apotheker, who took control of the outfit in September, after his predecessor was involved in a scandal involving an expense account and a former soft porn star, was thinking by releasing a downbeat  email to managers.

Reuters found a number of Wall Street analysts who were not impressed with Apotheker and his ability to turn the outfit around. It also found those who think that the shares are a good investment, even without him.