Apple finally releases cure for touch disease

poison-appleThe fruity tax-dodging cargo cult also known as Apple has finally released a cure for “a problem” in iPhone 6s which forced users to upgrade to the new iPhone 7.

Just before Apple released its iPhone 7, iPhone‘s started to get a mysterious illness which bricked them.  Apple refused to acknowledge that the fault existed, presumably because it meant that people were simply upgrading to the new phone rather than requiring it to be fixed.

All that changed this week when the Chinese government started to complain about the fault and was threatening a recall. Suddenly Apple admitted the fault and offered to fix it.

Of course, the problem is still nothing to do with Apple. Jobs Mob claims that some iPhone 6s exhibit Multi-Touch issues after “being dropped multiple times on a hard surface,” causing damage to the device. Under its repair program, Apple will fix affected iPhone 6 Plus devices for a service price of $149.

Of course, if users don’t want to stump up $149 there is always the chance to upgrade to a nice, but identical iPhone 7. We are not sure if that move will satisfy the Chinese and personally we hope not.

iFixit thinks that the problem is caused due to the wonders of Apple’s design. For some reason Jobs’ Mob has started soldering the touch screen controller to the phone’s logic board making repairs difficult.

Third-party repair outlets speculated that the issue could be linked to the same structural design flaw that caused the major “Bendgate” controversy. Of course Apple denies that there ever was a structural flaw.